Seoulscapade

The picture above was taken from my studio building looking up the road towards where I work, Seoul National University. But it’s not so sunny today as it was the day that was taken. Actually, it’s rained all day today, and I’ve discovered that my umbrella is the kind that will actually let water through once thoroughly soaked. It’s not Seoul-rain proof. Outside, on days like this, with the rain, neon, and busy streets crowded with umbrellas, I feel like I’m on the set of Bladerunner.

Now, I did pledge not to mix with a lot of “foreigners,” or “waegookin,” as non-Koreans are called, while in Korea. Then I rationalized that the more contacts the better, and besides they might introduce me to locals or help solve minor questions I have. So I met some expats one Saturday night and another group of them on another Saturday night. We met up in an area called Itaewon, whose hey day had long past, if you ask me. It’s a foreigners’ zone, home of the famous Hooker Hill and less conspicuous Homo Hill. It’s where Koreans, US servicemen and ESL teachers cram the sidewalks, shops and bars.

Stuffed toys along the sidewalk up near Insa Dong.

On both of these outings to Itaewon I heard a few negative comments about life in Korea that didn’t coincide with my experience. But then, these people had been here for quite some time. Perhaps that had something to do with it. Most were in the ESL industry, too, which accounted for some jaded remarks. Except for one of them, who’d been here for 5 years, I didn’t get the sense that they had much to do with Koreans on a social level or really got involved in the culture. How much had they really put into it? What did they really expect Korea to do for them?

Young ESL teachers here can fall into a habitual life of drinking and nightclubs. Most are single. They have plenty of time, money, and low levels of required commitment and responsibility. From what I gather, female teachers enjoy their work but their male equivalents hate it (maybe I only meet these types because others have better things to do than spend the night drinking with their own kind). If it’s not ESL teaching, possibly the late-twenties, early thirties age range has something to do with the attitude, who knows.

I’ve forgotten where I saw this but I have not forgotten how disturbed I felt when I saw it.

Three main negative issues emerged on those nights out. One was a common complaint about the shiftiness of the Directors in English language schools. Disagreements and money problems can arise. But this happens in other countries too, and in other industries; contractors everywhere will know what I’m talking about.

The next issue concerns relationships. One guy I know was going out with a girl for six months. But when her mother found out, she was ordered to stop seeing him. He got a text message that it was over and never heard from her again. In this case, a reason existed. People complain, however, about how some relationships formed with Koreans can be cut suddenly and without apparent reason.

It’s because some relationships are conducted with a kind of merciless calculation. Your Korean “friend” will end the relationship once he or she has got what they wanted out of you. To put it another way, you might fall into relationships that are conducted on “business” terms, without you knowing it. Something similar happened to me on a number of occasions, except that I knew the score, as I’ll explain.

King Kong up in Apkujong, a rich part of town.

I contacted a few locals (girls, of course) who’d advertised online to meet foreigners they could speak English with. Koreans might spend 10 years learning English grammar but they have trouble actually speaking it. One girl I meet had not actually spoken English to a native speaker before. She was a virgin in that respect, and I was her first. Anyway, different girls I met turned out to have different agendas. Some, it dawned on me, were looking for husbands and had no time to waste. If you didn’t meet the criteria, you were history.

I’ve heard foreign guys criticize these girls, especially the ones who use you because of your English. But, hey, that doesn’t bother me. The fact is I’m going out with younger and prettier girls than would ever give me the time of day back home. I’m not about to become indignant. Where I come from, if you’re over 35, you’re practically a non-entity to women under that age. Here, at least, even women under 25 will speak to me.

No, it’s not a self-esteem issue, it’s a brand name.

The last issue is that if you’re a foreigner involved in a serious problem or accident; you might be blamed for it simply because you’re a foreigner. A Korean confirmed this for me and said that I could very well experience it myself if I stayed here long enough; and if so, he said, I shouldn’t be upset. (We’ll see about that.) Of course, this kind of thing can also happen in other countries, after minor car accidents, for example.

My conclusion about these issues is this: in any country one is going to encounter problems, and I’ve yet to experience or hear about anything here that is any worse than some of the crap I’ve had to deal with in my own country. On top of that, I get more consideration as a foreigner here than I did as a citizen in my own country. So, I’d say to whingers, get a perspective or go home.

A unique, small-space, car-parking solution.